I’m not entirely sure why every time I try to relax there seems to be some kind of great force preventing me from doing so! As I am about 3 minutes into track #3, my ear loops are blown away with this zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzhhhhhhhhhffffffffffffffffsssssssssss sound of white noise. This happened on track #1…not on track #2…but now on track #3! Anyway…I decided to re-read the exercise described in our book and follow it with one of those nifty little sound makers that have a dozen different choices for your particular preference. By the way…I choose the rain forest.
I know we have been reading about how each step paves the way for others steps to reveal themselves. After dealing with the love and kindness mediation, it really put my heart and mind in the right state to welcome the subtle mind. Although I had difficulties directing my attention to the task of love and kindness, I found subtle mind more difficult since my mind rushes through thoughts and gives little time to quite down. I really believe this is my fault. Interestingly enough, I have always thought that I think before I act and observe myself. I didn’t realize that I allow myself to be so caught up with my daily activities that I had stopped observing. My physical wellness seems to be what keeps my mind and spirit going. From physical workouts, I am focusing my mental energy on something and manipulating my thoughts to focus and accomplish my goals…this also allows me rest and reflect after workouts on all aspects of life, which in turn returns me to me. If it wasn’t for my avid workout regimen, I think my mental and spiritual status would be struggling and my current struggles with spirituality would be worse than what it is. I do allow myself to get swept away with my TTD list (things to do) as wife and mother, my new objective is to take my time to evaluate my choices and actions throughout the day prior and long after I have worked out. It almost has been an on/off switch. As soon as I check my daughter into the child center at the gym, my mind switches on to focus mentally and physically which gives me my connection to myself. Then after I have finished my cool down-stretch regime/ (my version of meditative state), I proceed to the showers and once I leave the locker room…there goes the off switch. I think I should try to stretch that time of mental-spirit-body connection during those two hours to last the entire day. I think I will start those efforts on Monday…
Hi there!
ReplyDeleteI have had that Zzzzzzzz white noise in tracks #3 and #4 as well, both. Disappointed, isn't it? It is great that you've trying to overcome all this CD difficulties. Great observations and good luck with your practice and exercises!
Svetlana1.
KAP,
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you have a good plan. Just make sure that Monday comes and does not get passed day by day. Do not put off what you can do today. I am good at giving advice just not living up to it myself. I had the same problem with the CD and it was frustrating for me since I was truly enjoying this experience. This was easier for me then the one last week. I wish you the best of luck in applying this for longer periods of time throughout your day. For me, I find that it is easier for me in the mornings when i am enjoying my coffee, on my lunch break at the park, and then at night when I get finished with my school work. Good luck and God bless
Wow it sounds like you have been pretty unlucky with the tracks!
ReplyDeleteI am so glad for you that the loving kindness exercise opened you up for the subtle mind to come.
I wonder if you are my long lost sister with your TTD! I am constantly worried about getting everything on it done. At one point in my life I took it upon myself to no longer keep the list but rather write down what I had done in a day. (I think that made my need to complete things all the more urgent.)